5 Common Mistakes Self-Represented Parents Make

Representing yourself in family court is entirely legal and increasingly common. However, there are several pitfalls that can weaken your case if you are not careful. Here are five of the most common mistakes — and how to avoid them.

1. Failing to document everything. Judges rely on evidence, not emotions. Keep a detailed log of all communication with the other parent, missed pickups, schedule changes, and anything relevant to your case. Timestamps and screenshots matter.

2. Speaking negatively about the other parent in court. Judges are trained to look for cooperative co-parenting. Badmouthing the other parent — even when justified — can backfire. Focus on facts, not feelings, and let the evidence speak for itself.

3. Not following existing court orders. Even if you disagree with a current order, you must follow it until it is formally modified. Violating an order can result in contempt charges and damage your credibility.

4. Being unprepared for hearings. Show up with organized exhibits, a clear outline of what you want to say, and copies of all documents for the judge and opposing party. Disorganization signals that you may not be able to manage a parenting plan effectively.

5. Ignoring deadlines. Court filings have strict deadlines. Missing a response window or failing to serve the other party properly can result in default judgments against you. Use a calendar system and set reminders for every deadline.